By Ann O’Brien
Opinion:
At a recent family dinner, my teenage son drolly quipped, “Why are old people so afraid of AI?” (He also likes to remind me that “old” includes anyone born “way back in the 1900s.”)
His comment made me smile–and pause. Today’s teens will hardly remember a world without artificial intelligence. While I share their curiosity and excitement about how rapidly life is evolving, I also carry a measure of concern:
Will this generation learn to use AI in ways that enhance, rather than undermine, their well-being?
Gen Z has been labeled “The Anxious Generation” (Jonathan Haidt), in part because they came of age alongside smartphones and social media without enough protection in the digital world. Now, as AI becomes woven into everyday life, we face a similar moment of uncertainty.
With limited federal oversight, much of the responsibility falls to us: parents, educators, and communities. In many ways, we are figuring this out in real time. The question is not whether teens will use AI, but how we help them use it well.
As a therapist, I return to a simple principle: does this support a young person’s development or short-circuit it?
AI as Information, Tool, and Shortcut
Teens are already using AI as entertainment, a study aid, a writing assistant, and sometimes a way to bypass the work.
A helpful lens is to ask: Does this use of AI foster or stifle curiosity and creativity? Does it deepen understanding or provide quick answers that limit growth?
Literature helps adolescents understand their inner lives and connect with a deeper human experience. Writing challenges them to organize their thoughts, wrestle with ideas, and develop their own voice. This process, struggle included, is central to identity formation.
In my work, I’ve seen that well-being rests on knowing oneself and engaging meaningfully with the world. When evaluating AI use, it is worth asking: Is this supporting that process or supplanting it?
AI as a Digital Companion
Many teens are also turning to AI for emotional support and companionship. A 2025 Common Sense Media study found that 72 percent of teens have used AI companions, with over half engaging regularly.
This becomes concerning when AI begins to replace real relationships.
Many of today’s teens came of age during COVID, when screens became central to daily life. While often necessary, this may have limited opportunities to build self-regulation and in-person social skills.
Teens are now accustomed to less embodied communication, like texting, social media, gaming, where identity can be curated and connection happens at a distance. In that context, interacting with an AI chatbot may not feel especially different.
Add in the familiar concerns of adolescence—Will I fit in? Will I be judged?—and AI can feel like a safer option. Chatbots often affirm rather than give the honest feedback and complexity that real relationships require.
AI is not all bad. It may offer a space for exploration. The concern arises when it becomes a primary relational space, creating an echo chamber that limits growth.
The Development of Relational Intelligence
As a therapist, I’ve seen that strong mental health depends on navigating real relationships—including rejection and judgment—without falling apart. We learn to stand up for ourselves, read social cues, build trust, repair misunderstandings and show that we care.
These skills develop through both the messiness and strength of human relationships.
So, when considering a teenager’s use of AI, one question may be especially helpful:
Does this strengthen or weaken their ability to connect meaningfully with others?
AI is here to stay. So, let’s guide its use in ways that preserve what arguably matters most: our sense of self and our relationships with others.
To conclude, upon finishing this article, I asked my son for his thoughts. He smiled and said, “Wait… you mean I can’t just ask AI?”
Please continue to write in with questions and comments.
Ann O’Brien, LCSW, MSc, is a Playa del Rey resident and therapist, specializing in relationships. Contact her with questions or comments at ann@annobrientherapy.com or visit annobrientherapy.com. You can also visit her Substack, Relational Insights: at annobrientherapy.substack.com.